mental health, mindset

How to find hope when life gets hard

Finding hope when life gets hard may not seem possible every time, but trust me things do get better.

Life indeed isn’t always easy or a piece of cake. Sometimes it knocks you down and kicks you right in your ass unless you find the strength to get up again. There are days, the most delay and terrible days when everything seems dark and impossible.

Such days do not come with the warning signal either and yet we are so expected to deal with them calmly. When life gets hard, it is normal to get frustrated and annoyed.

when life gets hard

But at times, it becomes really difficult to return back to normal. I’m not going to give you false hope or statements like be positive or something that you don’t seem to accept or believe.

Often times, things go wrong and they need to in order to navigate us to the right path. Whatever struggle life brings you, always remember you cannot perish unless you accept yourself defeated.

When life gets tough, the only thing I do is to cling on to that little ray of shine and find hope in every possible way. This sometimes seems easier to say but finding hope when life gets tough is the key that keeps me grounded in every difficult situation.

when life gets hard

We cannot truly expect life to be generous always but what we can do is to stand up every single time when life throws us hard. It’s all up to us how we face these challenges and struggles. We can either accept the defeat or be resilient and find hope even through the darkest times.

You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated.  Because it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.”  – Maya Angelou

When I was in high school, I used to write a lot on ‘holding onto hope when life gets difficult’ or ‘life is tough but so are you’. However, I learned the essence of these words when life punched me hard and I had no other option except holding onto hope.

This is why, in my every poem and quote on Instagram, I make sure that I leave some tiny bits of hope and shine for the time when life seems hard. 

What actually is ‘HOPE’ and why do we need it?

“You may not always have a comfortable life and you will not always be able to solve all of the world’s problems at once but don’t ever underestimate the importance you can have because history has shown us that courage can be contagious and hope can take on a life of its own.” – Michelle Obama

Hope is the willingness to see the ray of shine even when life get hard and throws you in its chamber of darkness. Hope is allowing yourself to take a step in the direction of light, in the direction of possibilities.

It always doesn’t have to teach you to be positive but will surely enable you to think that things will get better, if not now then soon.

when life gets hard

Hope, my darling is the invisible helping hand that will grab you from the gloomiest corners of life and gifts you the beauty of light.

When life gets rough, hope is the lifesaving boat that will swim you through the wildest ocean.

We need hope, now more than ever when the world is turning upside down and life is getting uncertain and tough. We have always needed hope but finding hope during the crisis could be challenging and seemingly difficult.

However, it never is impossible to be hopeful even when life gets super tough and hard. We need hope to stay alive, to fulfill our life’s purpose, to help and spread humanity.

Isn’t this more than enough on why you shouldn’t give up hope even during the darkest hours of life!

I have compiled the list of 9 beautiful things to remember when life gets hard and you feel hopeless. These reminders will help you find hope when life gets hard and uncertain. 

Things to remember when life gets hard and you feel hopeless

“Hope can be a powerful force. Maybe there’s no actual magic in it, but when you know what you hope for most and hold it like a light within you, you can make things happen, almost like magic.” – Laini Taylor

1. This too shall pass

I’m pretty sure that you would be knowing the story behind this beautiful phrase. I’ve got this printed in big bold letters to remind me every time when life gets hard.

It’s so human of us to live in a single phase of life for too long and we totally assume that this isn’t going to change. This is our human nature where we quickly fall into the trap of all negative things and start assuming the weirdest scenarios inside our head.

I totally get it, life is hard and some days it gets quite a bit tough too, but remembering that this is not permanent gives the sense of assurance to look forward to a better tomorrow.

Nothing lasts forever and this darkness will too find its way back to light. As night cannot stay for too long nor can sun hold its shine all throughout the day, so will this phase be.

Just be willing to see the brighter side and always remember this as a phase that is bound to pass just like the seasons. When we cannot have the fall all around the year, we cannot have rained all the times, similarly, these gloomy days too won’t stay forever.

2. You don’t have to figure it out all

Sometimes life gets hard when you’re sure you have figured it out well. It suddenly spins around and turns your world upside down. In one moment, you feel like knowing everything and being super confident about the future happening while the other moment you finally realize that life’s started getting tough.

During such terrible moments. always remember that you are just a human who is doing his best and you clearly don’t have to figure out everything that will happen with you in the future.

We aren’t a genie or born with supernatural powers that can possibly make us certain about our future.

(Seeking professional help is okay. We all need it at times. Find the perfect counselor through online counseling here.)

This all comes in waves, sometimes they hit the shore while the other times they are far off but in any way we need to keep sailing. The hard truth about life is, it’s messy and uncertain.

Things actually never go as we plan or imagine but that’s not your fault. As a human, we all have our goals and aspirations, it’s all okay to dream a bigger, great life. But when things don’t work out as per your wish, don’t lose hope and feel defeated.

Accept that life gets tough but you gotta be tougher. Normalize that you don’t know and that it is alright to not know everything. This will take a huge burden off your shoulders.

3. There is light at the end of the tunnel

When life gets hard and uncertain, there’s darkness all around and we cannot seem to see even a faint ray of light. I can totally feel you, we have so many phases in our life where we don’t wish to talk about brightness or positivity.

We are so convinced that this is what life is and darkness is the sole companion. But when we grab ourselves out from that web of darkness, we eventually find the hope, the light. The light, my friend, is always there even when you feel shitty or worse.

We just have to be willing to accept that there’s no darkness in this entire universe that can curb the power of light forever. When life gets tough, I try to convince myself to look out for the light, even a faint beam works like a miracle.

I write it out all in my journaling pages that light will soon find me and this darkness has no power to hold me this tight.

Writing has saved me, has given me hope and this is why I want to help you too to get out of this state of hopelessness. Here’s the entire series on How the art of journaling healed me.

Just hold yourself tight and keep reminding your little heart that light is all on its way.

4. It’s okay to not be okay

The worst thing we can do with ourselves is to force a damn smile. We aren’t ready to accept that we aren’t okay and that it is normal to not be okay.

How many times did you ignore or distract your feelings when you don’t feel quite good? Why would we like to cover ourselves with the mask all the time?

It is all okay to feel the emotions and to have a bad day. It’s all okay to give up and rest. It’s okay to not know where you’re heading. You, my darling are a human who is allowed to feel everything.

When life gets hard and the world turns upside down, we force ourselves to make things alright. We surely should try, but don’t beat yourself up with the tag of perfection. Let’s not consider ourselves some superpower and expect to know it all.

We all, every single person be it a mental health advocate or therapist, have bad days. We too feel hopeless at times and it is okay. This is what makes us human. Please don’t be so hard on yourself and leave that work on life to do.

5. Bad phase to bad life

When we change our perspective and look at the broader picture, we understand that this is just a phase that too will pass.

The difficulties in life often come to teach us a lesson, to gift us something invaluable. If you are facing a hard time now maybe it has to offer you something that you would fail to see otherwise.

I had a difficult phase in my life where I was stuck with a toxic job and an unhealthy work environment that threw me in the dark phase and I had no way to help myself out.

But you see, that was a phase of my life that taught me what I actually wanted and what was my heart’s calling.

If it had not been that experience, I wouldn’t have been able to help so many of you through my words. My darling, this phase is not your entire life.

Life still has so much to feet to you, it holds so much sunshine in the backside of its pocket. Just be patient and don’t lose hope, for things will surely get better.

6. You’re not alone

Many a time while scrolling social media or glancing some Instagrammable pictures, we convince ourselves that everyone out there is happy and joyous. They are all living their life to the fullest and haven’t encountered the phase that we are passing through.

We are so blinded by the glitter that we accept the difficult life as our fate and destiny. We find ourselves alone in this entire crowd leading with happiness. When life gets hard, these pictures pinch us and make us feel bad about our own selves. But that’s not the true scene.

Everyone faces some or other problem, everyone has their own struggle and battle to fight. Sometimes, they choose not to show their difficult life situations but that doesn’t signify its absence. You, my dear, aren’t alone. We all are battling our own battles, some conquerable while the others making us survivors.

Do not think that this universe has been unfair to you and has dumped all the grief and hardships into your life. We are all getting our shares.

Reach out to your closed ones or ask for professional help, it’s all okay to admit that you aren’t okay and you need help. This will never make you less human.

7. Give up the control

We, humans, try to control every single thing that possibly doesn’t work as per our wish. We try to control the uncertain future and then if that future isn’t the one we imagined, we get super disappointed and are thrown in the ocean of grief.

Give up this power to control especially when life gets tough. We cannot control every situation because again we aren’t the superpowers. We also cannot control someone’s action or reaction, all we can control is how we respond to those actions and reactions.

when life gets hard

In a similar manner, we cannot possibly control what life brings to us or what it has to offer us, but we can totally prepare ourselves to face it. Giving up control frees you because we don’t worry about the things we cannot control.

Here are some mindful reminders to keep in mind when life gets hard.

8. Surrender to the Supreme Power

I always had this idea that surrendering means you totally rely on God or the supreme power for your life. While in the real sense, surrender is much deeper.

It’s about leaving all your worries and grief onto the Universe and have an immense faith that the Universe has your back.

I highly recommend these books that will bring you closer to the Universe.

Everything that is happening is all for your good for the Creator will never give you the sorrows that you cannot bear.

When we accept the fact that the Universe is always supporting and working with us, we move with faith instead of fear. We look for guidance, we express gratitude, we surrender.

And this is what makes the situation bearable even when life seems tougher. When we choose to surrender with faith, the universe extends its helping hand.

I learned this power of surrendering and connected deeply with the Universe by reading some amazing books. I highly recommend grabbing these magic books and consume their miracle.

9. Be kind to yourself

At any point of life, when you feel hopeless, always remember to show grace and be kind to yourself. We know, life is difficult and it gets worst at times but you too are a human who deserves kindness, who is worthy of all the love that you have for others.

when life gets hard Bless yourself with kindness and love that you shower onto others. Being kind to self also means telling no to everything that throws you in the darkness.

It also means numbing that inner critic that evokes the seeds of self-doubt and makes you feel worthless. Being kind to yourself also means allowing yourself to see the light even during the toughest times.

The bottom line

Finding hope when life gets tough is difficult but when you are there for yourself, things start getting better. My darling, hope is the only thing that saves the world from every uncertainty.

One of life’s biggest gift is that it gets tough. In that toughness and difficulties, we find our true strength.

But great are the men who held themselves tight even when life got hard and taught this world to never lose hope. It is solely because of the pressure that the coal turns to diamond.

And the same goes for us too. Without these difficulties, we would never actually realize ur true strength. Don’t pray for an easy life; pray for the strength to endure a tough one that leads to greatness.

( Talking to the therapists helps, do not feel guilty for seeking help. Check out the online therapy here)

Did this piece help you find hope when life gets hard?

How do you stay hopeful when life gets hard? I would love to know your views in the comments.

Here are some helpful articles for you :

7 mindful reminders for your mental wellness

How to clear your mind and release negativity

How to stay grounded during difficult times


  1. Zoe

    June 17, 2020 at 6:53 pm

    Hope so such an important thing! Without hope, people feel defeated and mental health problems get worse. But if we hope, we do have that light in the darkness 🙂

    1. Sonia

      June 18, 2020 at 10:08 am

      This reminds me of Andy from Shawshank Redemption. Hope is a good thing and nothing good ever dies. Thank you so much for your words, Zoe!!

  2. Kie

    June 17, 2020 at 6:54 pm

    This is such a beautiful and inspirational post! Thanks for sharing x

    1. Sonia

      June 18, 2020 at 10:05 am

      Thank you so much, Kie. I always love reading your work too.

  3. Samantha

    June 17, 2020 at 6:57 pm

    Great post. It’s so important to hold onto hope. Love the Michelle Obama quote!

    1. Sonia

      June 18, 2020 at 10:05 am

      Thank you so much, Sam!! It’s my dream to meet her or at least have my poem read by her ( crazy little life lol)

  4. Jen Towkaniuk

    June 17, 2020 at 7:24 pm

    Some of the best experiences I’ve had have come from tough times. Bad experiences are bad in the moment, but they can turn out to be the lesson you needed to make tomorrow brighter. Great post!

    1. Sonia

      June 18, 2020 at 10:03 am

      Thank you so much, Jen!! Bad experiences often teach us so many invaluable lessons. I adore your strength!!

  5. jimmy clare

    June 17, 2020 at 7:44 pm

    Great tips thanks for sharing them

  6. Chris

    June 18, 2020 at 8:13 am

    This couldn’t have come at a better time! Thanks for this beautiful piece, Sonia! 🙂

  7. Mehaa Seth Marwah

    June 18, 2020 at 11:36 am

    This is a beautiful read! thank you so much for sharing!

  8. Jennifer Van Haitsma

    June 18, 2020 at 4:17 pm

    I love the tip of “You don’t have to figure it all out.” That’s something I’m working on in therapy is trying to let go of my constant need for control that i developed as a child.

  9. Melisa

    June 20, 2020 at 9:07 pm

    Thank you so much for sharing! I think we tend to forget that we’re not alone in this – I too am working on this!

  10. Geoffrey Zziwambazza

    June 21, 2020 at 2:43 pm

    I really liked the quote from May Angelou. She is one of my favorite poets.

  11. Kimberlie

    June 21, 2020 at 6:30 pm

    Many of the tips you share on holding on to hope during challenges resonated with me. I am terrible at asking for help and suffering from the belief that I have to be “ok.” Thank you for shining a light on those deficiencies.

  12. Anna

    June 21, 2020 at 7:55 pm

    Really inspirational and uplifting post, thank you for sharing! 🙂

  13. Nancy Richardson

    June 22, 2020 at 10:03 am

    As always, beautiful. Hope is my favorite word. I love your quote, “life is tough but so are you.” That is like saying, “I am bigger than my problems.” And I kind of needed that today. <3

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